Wednesday, September 19, 2007

 

The Important Matter of Ducati the Masseuse


Hi Mates--

Mr. Fly was kind enough to allow me to post on his site, so that I may explain why I deleted my blog.

For many years, working as a masseuse and a doorman, I acquired worldly advice from top grade investment bankers (clients) on how to properly *evaluate* a stocks fair value. With this knowledge, I took my small savings, after my prison term had ended, and took up *arbitrage* investing, effectively eliminating all risk.

I've documented my methods for many of you, including Mr. Woodshedder. However, sadly, he's too simple minded to accept opposing views. Instead, he mucks around with his charts, while following Mr. Fly's picks. Very well. Sadly, his bottom of the bottle American education allows him to ignore true mastery of the markets.

Anyway, this year alone, I have successfully traded 193 stocks, with zero losses. I've netted well over 1,023.09% on my money, all through riskless *arbitrage*, of course. Much to the chagrin of college boy.

Now, the reason why I took down my blog is for the following five explanations:

1. Instead of blogging about stocks, I've chosen to invest in a personal clothing operation, where I will oversee the cleaning of clothing items vis a vis people within my community. Outside of my normal business hours, of course. Odd no? Viz.

2. The market will not crash, mind you, vis a vis subprime meltdown, sadly enough. I've predicted for years, the *fair value* of the Dow Jones Industrial Average stands anywhere between 4,400-6,808. Being that it's over 13,800 makes my work effectively useless and leaves me unfulfilled, vis a vis grossly inflated equity prices. Hence, my choice to remove the blog, while I still have the bottle to live out my laundry desires. Grant likes to look at yellow bloomers and purple neck ties, on occasion.

3. I have resumed my primary work as a masseuse, which is entirely time consuming and makes my fingers hurt badly. Following my daily ham sandwiches, I bottle it up and inebriate myself into a Scottish stupor. That is usually when I undertake stock market analysis--mind you, vis a vis sec filings. However, now working full time, eliminates my spare time to hammer away at the old books, thusly, viz. And, now I am hungry. Odd no?

4. MDAWSZ is a coward of a man, who refuses to meet me for a one on one mud wrestle fight. I've offered to bring my own *physician* to oversee the battle; but he doesn't have the bottle to crawl out of his neatly tucked hole, somewhere in Portland. Instead, he hides behind his computer screen, all the while talking tough.

5. I lost a bet to the office boy. About 4 1/2 months ago, I predicted HANS would go to $2.76, CENX to $1.13, BWLD to $4.55, RS to $0.05 and MVIS to $00.00, naturally. Moreover, I forecasted all of the crooks from Bear Sterns be fired to the man, for obvious thievery from the company coffers. Odd enough, BSC has a *fair value* of negative 23, yet it still trades comfortably above $115. I find that unsettlingly odd. Do you? Nonetheless, for some reason, none of my predictions, all derived from 10-k, 10-q and other U.S. government filings, came to fruition, odd no? I think not. Mind you, none of the above companies have effective *patents* that can fend off duplication. I've warned of such occurrences for MSFT some 25 years ago, yet the market ignores and inflates share price. Criminals.

So, in parting, I want to thank Mr. Fly for not punching my mustache off. I always found him to be humorous. I'll have you know, I have a large mustache, sort of like this guy. LMAOROFL!!

Anyway, goodbye and be well

Jog on

Grant

Comments:
This post is truly a work of art! Outstanding.
 
I guess now we know how this ended.
 
Brilliant!

Jog on.
 
FSLR going to $140 ... beleive it..
GOOG going to $600 before sept 30
BIDU going to $300... soon...
BUY these on the DIPS...
 
Vis! Jog! Criminals!
 
I bet he's on a plane to Portland where he'll end his days jogging the streets asking people about a man with an unpronouncable name...

It's a sad but appropriate end.

I guess the FED cut did him in?

-DT
 
speaking of MVIS.

http://gizmodo.com/gadgets/projector/first-hands+on-of-the-cellphone+sized-pico-projector-led-version-coming-301653.php
 
This comment has been removed by the author.
 
riskless arb bottle jog on viz is guilty as charged else he'd have come out of his hole guns blazing in his own riskless defense

goat fucker
 
a couple idears to bounce of the internets

if you like NOK, you gotta like CHKP - they do a shitload of biz w NOK

LLNW is gay

I think MVIS is ready to go
 
and not only is LLNW gay but its preference is to receive, not give, anal, no K-Y, no vaseline, no nothing
 
one more - CPO - have you seen the price of ears of corn this summer? wtf !? 50-60 cents a piece .. used to be able to buy 10 for a buck or two
 
Grant was right about ARWR, DIVX, MCHX, and NTRI.
 
Bruce.

Like I toldja.

MON stah.

-----------

Viz
Viz
Jog Jog
Odd?
Odd?
 
None of you goat fellatrixes are talking about Yukon Cornelius related matters today?

Taking Fly's analysis that you are all a bunch of late-to-the-table parisitic leechoids, I guess this is a bonus.

Happily sitting on Smaug's horde here.
 
One more bear throws in the towel. Fortunately Fleckenstein and Kass have a whole army of eager dummies waiting to get their eye sockets emptied.
 
Hey Danny, are you satisfied with this discount in VDSI, or are you hoping for more? DW
 
Also, will WWAT come back from Spain with a contract in hand? Still haven't heard an analysis if you please. Thanks, Danny
 
yeah, gold be breaking the fuck out ... no worries though - no inflation

MONster
 
Oh, and besides all my PM plays going loopy like a bunch of satyrs in a Korean statue park, ALVR just busted out to new highs as well.
 
Jake, you think MON never looks back from here? I have some cash in IRA's and kids accounts- needs to go to work.
 
rich a.

They have that article all F'd up. They are showing TI's piece o crap but refernecing mVIS. Notice they say it is loud? Thats becuase of the high whine of the COOLING fan. LOL! But yeah, LEDs will make it better....hah!...What a piece O crap.
 
Why can't gold breaking the fuck out be indicative of a strong healthy world economy? Every armchair fuck thinks rising gold means armageddon. Remember: Asians and Middle Easterners love that shiny stuff
 
KC -- I have tried to time that bastage before, and it always ended up that I bought it reluctantly, because of it's strength.

True story. I have a friend who's been bugging me about MON since it was in it's teens, he was big on the "valuing patents" viz, and schit. I watched it go from about $15 to $34, on a rope, and finally just broked down and bought some. It went to $54 before I got fully into my full position -- uncomfortable all the way because of the way it was running.

All of this was pre-split.

It's still that way-- a queasy purchase. You keep thinking - okay, this is the pullback, it'll rest now (and Aug 16th was a nice time to buy, in hindsight), but it seemingly just doesn't.

So I say feck it, and buy some here and there, and just hang on. I bought some in the sixties (post split) most recently. I'm gonna keep it forever (all of this is in the looooong term portfolio), and I think this is an "anchor stock," so if you have that attitude, I think you'll be fine.

These guys are way ahead with this GM revolution thing, and luddites aside, that schit is coming. They've already got the infrastructure in place.
 
Harry,

You are correct in that Asians and ME love that stuff -- especially when their reserve currencies are losing value. This can be good up to a point.

That point is $100+ petrol. The Ahabs are not stupid, they know what we are doing, and in a sense, they are trying to accomodate us. But we are dancing on a thin strip here.
 
if you want to look at the silver lining of gold breaking out, you can say its because of a strong global economy which means demand for hard assets/commodities/food/finished goods/services is not keeping up with the printing of paper.

iow inflation
 
a close over 4.85 is a mini 10 day breakout for MVIS ... could get it moving over that 5.00 mark
 
Come hang out on WallStreak
 
Bruce, not sure if you are joking or not, but I tend to agree.

One of the causes of the 2000-01 short recession was deflation (not to mention the 1988-2005 recession n Japan!). Could be Bernakster was seeing that coming from China, and is -- as one poster mentioned yesterday (Harry?) -- trying to break the yaun.
 
XING is zinging again.

"It's one big stock market party in China." --Fly
 
Paulson may want to break the yawn.. not sure Bernanke would pull a Soros & weild his power to do the same .. but conspiracy theorists unite!
 
Since Feb 07, this is my favorite story EVER!
 
That was the single greatest piece of writing ever to grace this fine earth. Fucking hilarious.
 
"masseuse" is French for a chick that gives massages.

Is this a 'chick' is named Grant? Or is it that Grant doesn't know the difference between what chicks that give massages are called and what guys (masseur) that do massages are called?
 
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