Fly on WallStreet

Seriously, it must be some sort of generational gap; but I can't take it anymore.

Lo and behold, I "hire" an old dude for some weekend blogging, and he turns into "The American Ducati," with all sorts of bearshitter trimmings.

Let me set the record straight. Boomers are narcissists, who offer nothing to us youngsters, but bad advice and bamboo paper. I mean, really, does it make sense having one shit all over my stupid blog, while I'm trying to eat a late night bowl of oatmeal (keep in mind, "The Fly" is married with kids aka slow lifestyle) ?

In short, I'd rather prefer kicking old dudes down steep flights of slippery steps, than have one post shit like "Microsoft Developing Heads up Display for Cars" on this here blog.

Don't fuck with MVIS. I'll break your fucking vinyl record collection to a million small pieces.

The following video will offset that shit posted below.

I'm still here assmunchers! Here's some GEN X for you.

• Well, it wasn't quite as cool as it is now.
• It was in the twenties when I bought it.
• I wish I had more.
• I bought one share just for kicks.

Microsoft may be ready to hook up with the auto manufacturers to provide heads up access to all the gadgets you current are fooling with while barreling down the highway drinking your SBUX.









If you want to read the details here is the patent application.

If you don't I think I have summarized the salient points:

• Moves all the information currently displayed on navigation screens, car stereos, cell phones, and instruments onto the windshield.


• The patent cites safety concerns, where people are constantly taking their eyes off the road to look at this or that screen.


• The heads-up display would be adaptive, showing information based on user and vehicle.


• Different user input methods, such as tracking head and eye movements, along with the more mundane button and voice command inputs.


• The diagrams submitted with the patent show some good ideas, such as vehicle, music, environment, and navigation information displayed in small boxes around the edges of the windshield.

I said I invest in what I know. Half my money is in mutual funds and the other half in equities. Here's a Boomer's Portfolio of equities - here's where the money is for the next five years.

You feeling bad?

DGX - Quest Diagnostics: doing all kinds of body fluid tests for what ails you. HIV, cancer, diabetes, illegal drugs, lead, etc.

MO - Altria: Cancer sticks and more. Exporting more cancer to the third world than ever before.

ZMH - Zimmer: Maker of replacement human body parts. Bionic Woman TV Show this fall should provide nice lift.

NVS - Novartis: You get cancer or HIV? Rest easy, we have a vaccine on the way. Or not.

You looking bad?

AGN - Allergan: Botox!

You done bad?

CXW - Corrections Corporation of America: Private Jails and Prisons, the only sure growth area industry left in the U.S. The more Homeland Security picks up, the more crowded the jails and prisons get.

You feeling good but pussy feels bad?

WOOF - VCA Antech: Veterinarians and animal hospitals. People are going nuts over their animals.

PETM - Petsmart: Toys for your pussy. If your snake needs crickets or mice, or your ferret needs whatever ferrets need, Petsmart will have it. WOOF and PETM need to hook up to get stronger.

Want to look good?

AEO - American Eagle Outfitters: Kids spending grandparents gift money.

CHS - Chico's: Boomer women fashions.

JNJ - Johnson & Johnson

I support diversity!

BNI - Burlington Northern: Good enough for the Oracle, good enough for me.

KFT - Kraft: Cheez Whiz, the Boomer food for the future.

D - Dominion Resources: Gas and pipelines from the ground to the furnance, they control it.

GTN - Gray Television: Pure play television stations in small markets. Elections!

IGT - International Gaming Technology: Slots where Boomers are trying to parlay their $44,000 into $45,000

MVIS - if you have to ask, go away.

Talk amongst yourselves, if you have any original thoughts, comment. I'm GoingLikeSixty and I'll be here all weekend. Don't forget to tip the parking valet.

Disclaimer: If you buy any of these stocks, you may get caught picking your nose right when that babe looks at you. And you may lose money.

Don't you people read comments? You just go off all over your keyboard?
Here's a representative sample courtesy of gappingandyapping:

Example #1 - What the fuck are you saying they are going to buy luxury goods for if they only saved on average 44k?

• If a Boomer has $44000 or $440000 there won't be any luxury goods. But if a Boomer has $4400000 they will be buying the occasional luxury item from their dividends.

Example #2 - You have all of this 44k that your going to need to spend on shit like living expenses which will be pumped back into the economy via Nursing homes

• Nursing homes ahahahahaha, $44000 will get you about 18 months in a home. Which has minimum wagers wiping asses and doing other paperwork.

Point #3 - Typically old people give money to their kids since they don't know what else to do with it.

• Is that your retirement plan? Wait for the old folks to kick? I may kill myself after hanging around listening to you punks, that's the only way my kids will have anything to inherit.

Point #4 - Hello, Boomers have kids that are just now getting into the working market.

• They are up to their eyeballs paying off student loans, buying HDTV's and trying to pay their taxes.

Point #5 - Worrying is for aids patients or mine field cleaners.

• I'm not worried, I'll be drawing down my portfolio or moving it into dividend payers while you scrounge around for the next hoverround growth or the next great fashion. Good luck with that.

Follow this Xer's, try to keep up.

I have included a pretty picture since many of you have trouble with words.

I know you worship The Fly, but his long term view is toward his next bowl of oatmeal.

There is a whole generation that will be change from expecting growth from their equities to expecting income.

• 10,000 Boomers a day are turning sixty.
  

Here's the deal: in twenty years since 1986-2006, less than half the increase in value of equities came from EPS growth for the S&P 500. The rest came from increased P/E and dividend reinvestment.

See? Look at all the pretty colors!

Boomers have driven the long term growth in the P/E, while the traders go in and out without a care about the P/E.

Companies current prefer stock buyback over paying dividends. Of the S&P 500, about 30% pay dividends.

Boomers are going to stop reinvesting our dividends, we're going to change from "growth" equities to "income" instruments. Growth investors will have to get used to single digit gains. Equities that pay a dividend will do better than the overall market.

UPDATE: More than one haven't added anything to the conversation other that: "Yeah, whut Bill says."

Bill based his whole post on a "Boomer Bust." It isn't going to "bust." Boomers sped up the market, Boomers will slow it down. Read the original post.

If the rest of you have an original thought, carry on.

I'm going to go lie down.

Boot the DJI

When Rupert gets the keys to the WSJ, the first thing he should do is announce that the Dow Jones Industrial Average (DJI) is outmoded, outdated, out-the-friggin'-door.

Here's why:

1. It doesn't represent the overall market. - The Wilshire 5000 (actually the 6503 or whatever the number is today) is a better index of overall market health. With the DJI, when Bill Gates farts, the rest of the market starts taking GasX. No matter what history indicates. Thirty stocks can not be a good indicator going forward.
2. The DJI companies don't even start trading at the same time so what's the sense of looking at the DJI until all the companies have opened?
3. The MSM and cable has annointed the DJI with magical powers. It's just a number. If it goes above 14,000 what's the big deal? If it goes below 13,000 what's the big deal? The breathless reporting of the cable financial news programs giving a second by second update of movement is laughable. Who pays attention to the DJI movement?

10% correction and we're all just fine, right?

On which tablet that Moses lugged down from Mount St. Helens, wearing his Crocs (CROX), was this written? Why not a 14.92% correction? Why not a 17.76% correction?

Jaysus, they are all just numbers! Dow Star Jones drops 150! Did the bubble ass burst?

Speaking of movements and Star Jones weight loss, here's your tip for today: GOOG has a new beta product. It promises to improve downloads.

I'm GoingLikeSixty and I'll be here all weekend. Don't forget to tip your servers.

Disclaimer: If you buy GOOG because of this post, your wife's OB/GYN will start sending her thank you gifts. And you may lose money.

Fly will be on special assignment in China for the FDA: too much lead in his ass and not enough lead in his pencil. Or he may be here.

But if you know The Fly, you know he will be nosing around.

But you have bigger worries.

Me and a 79 billion other baby boomers are going to start liquidating our investments starting in about five years. I'm GoingLikeSixty and I'm here to give you fair warning.

We have $16,000,000,000,000 invested, less few trillion based on what the stock market this past week.

“The demographic trends of the past have just not been strong enough to offset all the other influences on the stock market. But this is the granddaddy of all demographic shifts. We have never witnessed anything like this, and I am convinced it is going to be a determinant of asset prices going forward” says Jeremy Siegel, the Wharton finance professor and author of the book "Stocks for the Long Run."

Siegel says we're going to slim down your Dow Jones like Star Jones. The result is going to be just as ugly. You are going to choke on your cash with no where to put it as we band of boomers tighten on your choices like a gastric band.

The average boomer savings is $44,000.

We're going to be living high on that pile of cash we have accumulated after working for 40 years.

"Yeah, but..." is rolling around in your noggin right now. "Boomers have to spend that money somewhere. I want to be where they are spending it."

Here's where to look: Health care or luxury items. There will be no more middle class boomers. Boomers who have the money will spend it on luxury items, the rest of us poor schlubs will be hanging around the local community health clinic waiting for our shingles shot.

I'm GoingLikeSixty, and I'll be here all weekend. Don't forget to tip your servers.

"The Fly" is back, in full force. Thus far, my caffeinated induced purchases have paid off, in spades.

All day, I enjoyed big gains in ATI, LNN, MVIS, RS, KALU, GLF, FTK, BWLD and AAPL, amongst many others.

In short, my year to date gains are nearing 30%, via making a fucking truckload this week.

As you know, when the DOW hits 13,500, "The Fly" will throw some hedges on the desk, via short LAZ or long SRS.

Or, he may decide it's stupid, and just buy whatever the fuck the "slope of hope" fucker is shorting.

All in all, it's important to let you (internet vampires) know how much smarter "The Fly" is than Angelo Mozilo, despite his vast fortune and old penny tan.

Finally, if a shotgun were put to my head, in order to extract one stock pick, I'd say "shoot me sir, if you must, but before you do: go long iiG."

NOTE: Be sure to visit this site, over the weekend. I have a really old dude guest blogging. It should make "interesting elections."

I bought 10,000 iiG @ $19.40.

Disclaimer: If you buy iiG because of this post, Angelo Mozilo's tan will cause CFC to go bankrupt. And, you may lose money.

Angelo Mozilo is mentally ill.

I sold 2,000 NGS @ $16.70.

How 'bout a late day rally?

Please ignore how this movie ends.

I bought 500 LNN @ $38.19.

Disclaimer: If you buy LNN because of this post, your butler will turn psycho. And, you may lose money.

I sold 2,000 KALU @ $67.54.

-- Stupid Corn chart


During this decline, the price of corn and wheat were untouched. So, with that being said, it is fair to say those fucking farmers are still rich.

Hence, "The Fly" will "milk them," via LNN and VMI long positions.

Angelo Mozilo, CEO of CountryWide Financial


Oil hasn't bounced yet. As the market mellows out, look for funds to start flowing back into energy related names. Within the sector, I like UPL, VLO, NEU, ALJ, SU and GLF.

Also, ignore the assholes who say "the Fed's job does not entail saving bad investments, via cutting rates."

Fuck that.

At this stage, the Fed has to cut rates, in order to stay ahead of the curve. The funny thing is, most of the fucktards who are against cutting rates are also bears, who believe we are heading into recession. In other words, they'd prefer to keep rates high, in order to press the economy into a recession. You know, they want to bank a little coin off their shitty short positions.

However, keep in mind, if the bear pundits are correct and we head into recession, clear the deck, periscope up; because we are going down.

Today, I like the action in industrial, energy and metal names. I do not like how the stupid "safe haven" tech sector is behaving, with knifing action in MRVL. That company blows.

With my money, stubbornly, I will buy LNN and ATI. Also, if I'm in the mood, I might take a small bite out of UNG.

You probably don't follow Howard Lindzon on Twitter. I did, but I gave up on him and everybody else. I closed my Twitter account.

Howard's a bright guy.

But his Tweets were all about his peeing. As we say at our house, I'm a Russian because European. Maybe it's something about Phoenix, where he lives, but he is always looking for a place to take a pee when he's on the road. So he would Twitter about it. I think he thought that was the social thing to do.

Back to him being a bright guy. He was the angel investor that gave Wallstrip.com the boost just when it needed it. Urinangel? He obviously recognized a unfulfilled niche in financial analysis (pop culture meets stock culture plus stocks at an all time high) and had great faith the the people that made it work.

Work it did. CBS bought them.

But watch it during the week - or check the archives - the weekends suck because it's I'm Howard the Putz Show.

So when Howard Lindzon talks, I like to pay attention. I do my trades with Upchuck & Schwab, but do all my own research by reading The Fly, Howard, and others.

Here's what Howard says:

It’s obvious I think it’s a pretty much useless affair, but than again, I am small and I don’t trust anyone on the street. You should not either. You should enjoy reading the people on my blogroll, but do your own work and thinking.

BTW: Howard, where is your blogroll?

I have no idea how much money he controls through his hedge fund and other companies. Don't care.

The best advice I ever got was "invest in what you know" and "do your own research."

I'm always open for new ideas, I cruise the blogrolls regularly. Give me your genius (other than your ownself.)

I'm GoingLikeSixty and I'll be here all weekend, please tip your bartender.

Unlike people who buy stocks, "bearshitters" are in the game for something extra. They want the entire country to collapse and "shit the shower."

Now, I'm not talking about your run of the mill plunger. You know, the "smart guy" with an edge, looking to make a quick buck, via driving a stock lower.

No.

I'm talking about the guy, like Doug "fuckbag" Kass, who wants the whole system to come crashing down. "Let it all come down, girls."

I know these people. At heart, truly, they are asshats, skeptical of everything from their electricity bill to the price of tea in China town.

Most of them are unable to view things objectively. Instead, they have static opinions on important topics ranging from "how to smoke crack" to "investing alongside armageddon," relying on what they consider to be sheer "intellect," when making financial decisions, rather than foolhardy optimism. Sort of like evil robots, or gremlins who have eaten past 12:00 am.

As you know, all these fuckers want is massive unemployment, followed by death and mayhem, in order to bank a little coin.

Now, don't get me wrong, "bullshitters" have their own vices, such as "wishcasting" for hurricanes or "playing the war," via defense stocks.

In short, my point is: Doug Kass is a dick and should be caught kayaking in the Gulf of Mexico, while a fucking Category 5 hurricane comes barreling in, slamming him into a few hundred offshore oil rigs-- effectively allowing "The Fly" to bank a little coin in UNG.

Despite the "tanned man's" bearish comments on the U.S. economy, the market closed flat. Forget about what you thought the market was supposed to do, following the BAC/CFC deal.

The fact of the matter is, recent gains are being consolidated. Once again, the bears are weak, unable to mount a significant raid and the bulls are energized.

In my world, complete boredom reign's supreme, as most of my positions put me to sleep. Despite the knifing action in LNN, iiG seems somewhat less-than-milquetoast.

I lost a bit in ATI today, while gaining some in GME. All in all, a "fuck this, let's go throw some water balloons off the roof" type of day.

With my money, stubbornly, I will continue to bid for LNN. With worldwide fresh water supplies dwindling, coupled with rich farmers, both VMI and LNN should continue to do well.

Also, natty reversed course today, apparently reaching a bottom. I feel the natty trade has very little downside, with lots of upside. As you know, I own UNG, GLF and NGS.

Finally, it's worth noting, Doug Kass, from RealMoney.com, is a complete asshole, not to be confused with half or partial assholes. His commentary is meaningless and his *patents* are worthless.

I bought 2,000 LNN @ $38.45.

Disclaimer: If you buy LNN because of this post, your Mother will marry Angelo Mozilo. And, you may lose money.

Angelo Mozilo is a tanning fool.

Angelo Mozilo, CEO of CountryWide Financial


Fuck these mortgage losers. I am starting to see sign's of a rally, despite the "Golden Bear" being absent.

To gauge the Nasdaq, watch ERTS, AMGN, NVDA, RIMM, AMZN and NIHD for tells.

With my money, I have been nibbling at UNG and ATI.

Additionally, I took down an initial position in IIG.

I'm afraid to be seen with those fucking pink cups. So, I will have someone transfer the contents of the Dunkin' cup into a Starbucks cup. You know, this way, I can "hob knob" with a bunch of assholes, talk about stocks, letting them know how much smarter I am than Angelo Mozilo, while sipping on my "rich man's coffee," aka Starbucks.

Oooh.

God forbid I was seen with a Dunkin' Donuts cup, one might think "The Fly" had quit the business and become a sub-prime lender or worse, a fucking homebuilder.

Developing...

Gee, Mr. Mozilo is one heck of a rally killer, with his "housing will lead us into recession" rhetoric. See, it's important to ignore statements from desperate men, like that tanned fucker.

Just because his life is a living hell, doesn't mean CROX, AAPL and RIMM can't do well.

Long story short, we will probably be down 1%+, by the close of trading today.

There are some sign's of life, specifically in the homies, drugs and oil stocks. Actually, within the homies, it's a tale of two cities. There are gains to be found in OHB, CHCI, BHS, MHO, LEN, WCI, PHM, TOL and KBH, while BZH, LEV, NOBH and MTH suck balls.

In short, stay away from the homies.

The brokers are weak, with the exception of BSC and JEF.

The biggest losers today are found in the basic resource sector, with mammoth losses in NUE, ROCK, X, ATI and SCHN.

Basically, I got greedy chasing ATI, after such a strong rally. I should have been content with my FCX and CENX gains. Instead, I am here enjoying the other side of the mountain.

Naturally, the market isn't going to recover overnight. Theories of a "v shaped" recovery is wishful thinking, not realistic.

However, I do believe the odds are stacked against those who are short, mainly because the trade is very crowded.

During this decline, I might nibble at some ATI, LNN and MVIS, or do nothing. I might just sit here, laughing like a senile crazy man, while throwing paper weights at my trader/servant.

This is for you chart chomping fools.

As you know, technical analysis is a splendid way to combine ignorance and laziness.

Tomorrow, Tim Knight and Doug Kass will dine in hell.

At the end of the day, access to liquidity makes the difference between "Joe Fucktard" and "Joseph Coinmore." Many small investors were wiped out, during the recent 10% decline.

They were over leveraged and under diversified.

On the other hand, those with liquidity or the ability to add dollars into bullshit brokerage accounts fucking banked coin--buying at the bottom.

Naturally, most of you were wrong, and shorted at the bottom--like some sort of retarded submarine operator. Those with balls stepped in and bought FCX, CENX, RS and others-- at bargain basement prices.

My point: If you are poor, quit trying to play this market. You will, eventually, have your face punched off.

Stick with mutual funds.

Today, I banked more coin, as the basic resource stocks charged and "mud stomped" the shorts. As you know, currently, I am long ATI, RS and KALU.

In short, today was uber impressive, with big gains in a variety of sectors. Even old takeover plays are bullish again, like OEH.

My game plan is to squeeze the market, until the DOW hits 13,500, then consider some hedges.

My buy list includes: FMCN, ATI, CN, IIG, HANS, UNG and LNN.

I bought 6,000 ATI @ $98.55.

UPDATE: I bought 5,000 ATI @ $97.

Disclaimer: If you buy ATI because of this post, the FBI will fine you for hiring illegal immigrants. And, you may lose money.

I bought 5,000 shares of UNG @ $36.44.

Disclaimer: If you buy UNG because of this post, the Fed's discount window will deny your loan request. And, you may lose money.

I want to borrow money from the discount window.

Look you little shits, the CFO sold 40,000 shares-- for a big profit of 80k. Am I happy about this?

No.

Does it mean the long term story is derailed, abandoned for asshattery?

No.

Without being emotional, understand that people have monetary needs. We do not know if Mr. Wilson has a sub-prime loan to pay off, or maybe a gambling debt with members of the Italian mafia.

We do not know.

At the end of the day, he makes 185k per year, hardly enough money to live comfortably.

In short, nothing has changed, with the exception of a destitute CFO scrambling for peanuts.

I bought 1,000 NKI' @ $4.24.

Disclaimer: If you buy NKI' because of this post, the next time you go on a road trip, you will fall asleep while driving. And, you may lose money.

I sold NGAS, BEXP and FUEL.

I will hold UNG, NGS and GLF.

I'll have you know, I hate Google and may just switch this stupid blog to a domain under my registration, WWW.FlyBanksCoin.com.

Apparently, the bears have lost their grip, as the indices scream higher. Naturally, I'm sure they (bear shitters) will attempt to mark down stocks, using the media as their personal mega-phone. However, without panicking the weak bulls, this market will not go lower. It's too cheap.

As you know, basic resource stocks are leading the way higher, with big dicked gains in RS, CENX, PCU, KALU, amongst others.

Also, the Yen is getting its pants kicked off, enabling the Yen carry trade fuckers to resume business.

Right now, I am buying ATI. Generally, I like stocks poised to break the psychological $100 barrier. Plus anyway, I like the company. My sense, the stock rips to $104, within days.

Additionally, I like the action in BWLD, MVIS, LNN, FMCN, NGS and GLF.

In short, the bull is back.

Get long.

I sold 10,000 CENX @ $47.40.

Fuck the bear shitting propaganda writers.

The bottom is in.

If that COF news was released early last week, the stock would have been obliterated--taking down the entire market with it. Instead, the stock moved higher, as investors said "fuck it" and went long.

While it's true, much of the recent decline can be attributed to real fundamental risk; a lot of selling was done under duress, caused by psychological financial warfare.

Just looking at the headlines, one would believe the U.S. is poor and entirely dependent on credit-- nation of fucktards. Please, give me a fucking break.

By far, we are the wealthiest nation in the world-- with lots of stupid millionaires, who consume until they're blue in the face. It is my belief, the stock market will increase enough to cushion the blow of the housing crash.

One rising asset class will replace another.

For me, a key tell was today's rise in the basic resource stocks. If we are heading towards recession and global growth is grinding to a halt, why was RS, PCU, CENX, ATI, CLF and many others punching the faces off the shorts?

While it's true, many stocks have been marked down, causing many of you (internet fools) to have the balls to question the semiconductor chips inside my "calcualtor brain." Remember, money is not coined quickly or effortlessly. There will be times when you will question the day you were conceived, puzzled by random declines in some of your favorite names. And, there will be occasions when you feel like a "bullet proof investment oracle," unable to lose money.

My point: "The Fly" is much smarter than you, even during periods of rapid decline. Fuck around and start betting against my positions, you'll find yourself with those sub-prime fuckers, being foreclosed on.

NOTE: I'm thinking about iiG, ahead of numbers.

I bought 2,000 LNN @ $39.25.

Disclaimer: If you buy LNN because of this post, you will spill boiling hot coffee on your fancy pants. And, you may lose money.

Most of you are sub-primed fools.

I bought 10,000 CENX @ $43.75.

Disclaimer: If you buy CENX because of this post, you will get abducted and probed by space invaders. And, you may lose money.

The bulls are buying all of the speculative momentum names, in a variety of sectors-- even financials. My sense, the market is poised to move higher, dramatically breaking the jaws of those who sell short.

EBAY, AMZN, RIMM, AAPL, GRMN and NVDA are leading the way, in the Nasdaq 100.

Also, it's nice to see MVIS comfortably in the green.

May Boenning & Scattergood fall down a flight of spiked stairs.

Right out the gates, the market is getting "knee-capped" with selling in the homies, industrials and select financials. Also, Cramer is on his fucking blog talking smack. He is now declaring the price action of MHS to be a leading indicator of U.S. recession. Needless to say, Cramer is now pounding the "recession drum."

Now, with all this financial bullshit going on, it is plausible to see our GDP go red for a quarter of two. Instead of playing "Eddy Economics," I prefer to throw darts at Greenspan's face (not real face, a picture) and make believe the world is made of jello.

Who fucking knows?

As for me:

Boenning & Scattergood are my new enemies. They downgraded LNN, after pumping it a few months ago. Without doubt, those fuckers will be receiving an "Asshat of the Week" award, in short order. The volume is very light. The stock is very cheap.

Aside from rumors of recession, the economic sensitive metal sector is on fucking fire. How's that possible, you might ask? Because not everyone is a pussy.

Right now, PCU, ATI, ACH, RS, STLD and even ERS look good.

Finally, as you know, natty is weak, due to lack of hurricanes. How retarded is that?

Soon enough, my hairy knuckled friends, a storm will appear and the idiots who trade natural gas will bid the commodity higher.

Fucking morons.

Despite what the fucktards are saying on CNBC, today was a major win for the bulls. I mean, what the fuck is Maria and Co. smoking?

Today, despite CFC getting its lips punched off, the market rallied hard off the lows. During the afternoon, it looked like the market was about to "shit the shower," then boing-- big dicked rally.

That tells me, investors are bargain shopping, willing to bid up RIMM, BIDU and many of the momentum names.

This is big.

Also, don't forget about the trannies, up 1.84% on the day. Typically, the direction of the trannies is a leading indicator.

My point: Ignore the drama queen's on CNBC, trying to drum up fears-- in order to keep their queer ratings high.

My approach is simple. Buy the stocks that were sold off unjustly, while remaining aware of the existing risks. Therefore, avoid financials, while loading the hammock ("The Fly" keeps his stocks in a hammock) with tech, infrastructure and select consumer discretionary stocks, like HANS or BWLD.

Bottom line: Big win for the bulls, following a key reversal.

Kill Doug Kass, via RDN going higher.

Listen here "weak link"--

"The Fly" will not be here forever, making you money in FCX, while simultaneously poleaxing you in UNG. As you know, this blog shit is stupid and will eventually end. In the meantime, try to learn from the small things I mention, such as:

Never buy too much of one stock, while over caffeinated.

For example:

On Friday, had you consumed 15 Monster Energy Soda's, barring cardiac arrest, then "reviewed" my weatherman's report, you might have bought a bus load of calls on UNG.

Wrong play, hatfucker.

While it's true, I believe the GOM rigs are "glorified bowling pins;" I would never buy calls--based upon a fucktarded weather report.

No real edge there--jerk off.

My exposure to natty is nominal, even though it's highlighted. Aside from natty, I own lots of stocks, in a variety of industries.

Basically, as a rule of thumb, never invest more than 10% of your bullshit assets in one investment vehicle.

Unless of course, you are one of those degenerate OTB guys.

As for UNG:

It's down to its historical range. Should another storm develop, "Gas Vegas" will be right back to where it was on Friday.

Pikers.

I sold 7,000 FCX @ $80.30.

UPDATE: I sold 6,000 FCX @ $79.33

Last week, many hedge funds were forced to liquidate positions they didn't want to sell. As a result, many stocks were walked down, as if they were loaning money to trailer park owners.

For example: Look at HANS.

A few week's ago, HANS blew out their estimates, sending the stock from $42-49. Post sub prime blow up, the stock went below $41.

Wrong.

In my opinion, without doubt, HANS is going back to $49--now up $1.28 to $43.40.

As you know, currently, many stocks are undervalued and should be bought. However, it's also worth noting, that doesn't mean shit from shingles--if the market starts nosediving, again.

In short, you have to have a fucking "calculator brain" to figure this asshattery out. I'm sorry to disappoint, but most of you are better qualified to fix a flat tire, than fuck around with stocks and bonds-- and other stuff like that (Reminder: despite "The Fly's" 3rd grade writing style, he is still smarter than you).

As for the Hurricane Front:

Forget about Dean. I'm on to bigger and more deadlier storms. 92L is making its way towards Florida and is thirsty for some light sweet crude. Naturally, I really don't know my dick from a doorknob--when it comes to the "global warmed" weather patterns. However, using simple probability formula's, I can tell you: the GOM is going to have its rigs eaten for it.

So, as a result, I feel it makes sense to buy more UNG, FUEL, NGAS, GLF, BEXP, NGS and maybe a little TRGL.

NOTE: LNN is my top pick.

NOTE II: I realize, not once did I mention retail, despite it being my "sector spotlight." I changed my mind. Plus, I was too lazy to change the title, despite spending 30x more time giving you (internet leech) a ridiculous explanation. So, fuck you.

This just in:

"Fly, it appears Hurricane Dean aka "Deacon of Death" is going to burrito into Mexico, sparing the fucking oil rigs and dumb people who live near the Gulf. However, from the vantage point of this bullshit helicopter, I see another blob forming-- and hope to have news soon.

Basically, your natural gas stocks may fall at the open, thanks to Dean's laziness-- unwilling to jog north. However, looking at this new blob, coupled with the mathematical improbability of the Gulf missing two years of "hurricane fun" in a row (sort of like landing 123 risk less trades in a row), I suggest buying more--if the dip is deep enough.

Then again, what the fuck do I know? I'm just a hack rent-a- weatherman, flying in a 1950's army helicopter."

NOTE: "The Fly" will lecture his fucking weatherman about his belligerent tone.