Wednesday, November 07, 2007

 

The Important Matter of Bad Nicknames

I'm fucking busy, so this will be brief.

A long time ago, "little Fly" was a kick ass baseball player, a pitcher of course.

I must have been 12 years old, on the mound, striking batters out--as usual.

Then, all of a sudden, my Mother started screaming from the stands-- a nickname that I had never heard before.

Much to my chagrin, she was cheering: "go Scooter go, go Scooter gooo!"

What the fuck!

As you know, being the rock star little league pitcher that I was, this was an alarming turn of events--having my own Mother heckle me, with queer nicknames, from the stands.

I stepped off the mound and gave my Mother one of the looks--but it was too late.

The other team had caught on, appreciating the femininity of this nickname, and began chanting "Scooter."

Being the level headed pre-teen that I was, I planned to ignore them, while mowing down their bullshit lineup.

But, then it happened.

The Scooter shit reached a fevered pitch, with laughter everywhere, making "little Fly" embarrassed/agitated.

I snapped.

I stepped off the fucking mound and threw a fastball into the opposing teams dugout, screaming: "fuck you assholes."

Shortly thereafter, "little Fly" was removed from the game, kicking and screaming, ordered to leave the ball park.

As I walked home with my Mother, all I heard was "Scooter, Scooter."

Cocksuckers.

Comments:
that is really funny
 
Scott is God!
 
At least she didn't shout "Fancy! Fancy!"
 
It's all better than my mother nicknaming my brother Scott... Scat
 
at least you didn't pull a John Rocker
 
I wish I had the balls to fight back like that as a child.
 
Speaking of mowing down little leaguers, I once drilled 3 batters in a row during a game.

The first kid I hit in the ribs and he dropped like he was shot with a gun, crying and screaming.

The next kid I hit in the calf and he jumped around and hobbled like he had lost his leg.

The last guy I hit was already bailing out of the batter's box but I still managed to hit him in the thigh. I felt so bad but I had absolutely no control.

I recall my coach coming out to the mound and just telling me to slow down my pitches and get the ball over the plate.

I then proceeded to strike out the next 3 batters with my curveball as they were all totally scared of getting drilled.

Suffice it to say that I did not come out and pitch the next inning, however.
 
Cutyourlosses:

Touching story.

I was hoping for a helmet story.
 
I used to pitch as well. I never had a good fastball, but my curve ball was killer. I was an all-star player, but quit my freshman year in HS as the coach was an ex-marine drill seargent, and he made playing miserable. Plus, I discovered sex and rock and roll at about the same time.
 
"I was hoping for a helmet story."

As a kid, I threw unmercifully hard but had absolutely ZERO control as a pitcher. If I'd have hit a kid in the dome they'd likely have hauled my ass to jail for murder.

Thank God I ended up in centerfield ...
 
kick my ass indeed...touching, turn down the heat...amazing II huge croc tears...that is why your being such a puss...put on some JSDA ahead of earnings thursday and stop the wine and cheese routine...better yet fade me and go away.
 
My neighbor's dog's name is Scooter ... he takes big dumps.

Reminds me of "The Fly"
 
Frosty:

Incoherent, as usual.

Good job.

Cutyoulosses, so is your name Lenny Dykstra?
 
I call bullshit.

I clearly heard a middle aged woman cheer "Go Chuckie, go".
 
The Fly's time machine is the shirt on his back.
 
NAILS to you...little league, live the dream.
 
Nice... I always figured volleyball was your sport though.

-DT
 
I had him pegged for some fancy fencing & lawn tennis
 
"Cutyoulosses, so is your name Lenny Dykstra?"

Lenny Dykstra? No.

Speaking of which, how in the world did that guy ever get around to giving stock market advice - moreover - how in the world did ANYONE in their right mind ever decide to listen to what he had to say about the markets ?

I have nothing personally against Dykstra whatsoever other than to say that I care little as to what stocks he likes or dislikes.
 
So, when you fired the ball into the dugout, ya hit anyone?
 
Football story for you. I am not a natural athlete. No prowess, no grace, not fast, (was) thin. But I am pretty strong. Damn strong, actually. Always have been. And smart.

Freshman year, I wanted to play football. Coach said sure, come to our walk on. Unfortunately, there was only one position available to try out for: right guard. Coach was worried I would get hurt. I was 1/3 the size of the other linemen. I looked ridiculous.

Fuckers made fun of me. Said they were gonna kill me. Snorted and snuffed. Called me names. Especially Paul Chacon, a 400 lbs latino who was rumored to be in a "gang."

What these dicks, including Paul, didnt realize was:

a) I rode my 40 lbs Schwinn 10 speed for hours a day in the foothills of Boulder.
b) I understood space alien concepts like "leverage."
c) I wanted to hurt them, because I was an angry young man.
d) I had something to prove.

First play off scrimmage I tore a ligament in Paul's right knee. Chopped him down with my space alien lower body leverage. Second play I bit someone. Third play I started a fight with the star quarterback because he "wasn't doing his job."

Started every game. We went 7-0. To this day coach still uses me as a lesson on heart, crazy, and also...leverage.

To this day Paul Chacon is probably pushing a broom with a limp.
 
Scooter doesn't have a V or I in it, so it is okay.
 
After baseball, I played drums in the band. We had a great 5A bank. Won state, but never got any recognition because of the football team.

I went to Summerville High School, of coach John MiKissick fame. Winningest coach in HS football history. I hated all things football in HS because that's all Summerville was.
 
Nice Boomer!

USA 10% off for Canucks....

Fly's retirement = Market Top
 
She was actually paying you a compliment. She thought you were as good as the original 'Scooter' Phil Rizzuto. However, she apparently didn't know the difference between shortstop and pitcher.
 
Look at the strength of JCG in this mess. Honestly its the best performing stock I own I think. The only stock I am buying hand over fist. Just bought another 1000 shares.
 
How bout a fucking rally out here. We have been beaten to a pulp. Lets get some confidence going here. By the way I just sold 10,000 shares of MVIS to fund my JCG buy. I would rather own a company that believes in their stock. I still own 25k shares of MVIS so don't worry not going negative, but investor relations didn't answer me so fuck them.
 
LOL, That was too funny!

I fell of my Staples pleather chair reading that...thanks for the laugh.
 
We are getting weaker and weaker.
 
Hsu and Motley fool have been putting out teasers and insisting you buy before tonites earnings in CTRP.

It's a great Costanza play at a mere 30 Price to sales and 100 TTM PE (forward is over 60)

Who's in!
 
Space Shuttle just flew over my house and the sonic boom has all of the dogs barking like Becky Quick on T. Boones plane.
 
I'm 5'10". Can't jump. Slow. But I'm a natural shooter with a basketball. Put one in my hands and I'll shoot your fucking eyesballs out of your head. 95% from the free throw line, 65% from three point range. Like I said, a natural.

Growing up, whenever school got called on account of snow, I'd walk to the park with a basketball in one hand and a snow shovel in the other. I'd scoop the snow off the court, then proceed to burn the net off the rim until dark even though I was freezing my ass off. Everyone thought I was nuts.
But it eventually paid off.

During the state tournament, we scored to tie the game with about a minute to go. The opposing team "surprised" us with a full court press. They gave me the ball. I started to dribble upcourt and got trapped near the sideline. The guys who trapped me made the fatal error of fouling me. The opposing team's coach went ballistic, screaming at the refs that I wasn't fouled. He got slapped with a technical.

I went to the line. Of course, I made the first two shots. I looked at my coach to see if he wanted me to shoot the two shots for the technical. He gave me the nod. Of course, I made those two shots as well. Then when we brought the ball inbounds, the fuckers immediately fouled me again. Of course, I made those two shots as well. So, I scored 6 points and only two seconds had ticked off the clock. True story.

And nobody ever called me Scooter, or Chuckie.
 
Old wrinkled up fuckers have seized the market. Who knew those fuckers would get their knees and hips repaired after the many stairwell accidents.

Apparently nobody wants to Own WM or COF
10% Div WM. The only problem is you lose 50% of principal.
 
cigars

CTRP: Already own it (@ 52.33).

Travel to China is steadily increasing. Personal and business.
 
MABW- They called you "White Boy"
 
And you gotta wonder how much of the olympics is priced in...surely it will do well.

Normally it would seem stupid to buy a stock with htose multiple, but it seems the general China rule is stock with 100 P/Es go to 200. And those with 200 go to 300.

So it is likely a screaminbg buy here.
 
Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link



<< Home

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?

 Subscribe in a reader

DISCLAIMER: This is a personal web site, reflecting the opinions of its author. It is not a production of my employer, and it is unaffiliated with any FINRA broker/dealer. Statements on this site do not represent the views or policies of anyone other than myself. The information on this site is provided for discussion purposes only, and are not investing recommendations. Under no circumstances does this information represent a recommendation to buy or sell securities.